no trip to the third world is really complete without a medical crisis

 

having run a slight fever off and on for three days
and not following any pattern of illness that i am familiar with
i retreated to chennai for a dose of doctoring and Olympics

 

medical care, indian style:

on the advice of a friend, i phoned up lister metropolis
like a genie, the technician magically appeared
at my hotel room just one hour later
it cost two dollars for the house (hotel) call
they take as many samples of as many body fluids as you care to part with
and you can order as many lab tests as you want
(well, up to 400 plus) in whatever flavor you want
this really eliminates the middleman (apologies to any middlemen who might be reading)
i was like a kid in a candy store
but limited myself to just two: malaria and typhoid
i paid the phlebotomist, who was efficient and competent,  
430 rupees (seven dollars for the samples, 2 dollars for the house call)
with the receipt in my hand i went to lister the next morning in a rickshaw
they printed out the report and handed it to me in a sealed envelope

 

in terms of cost, convenience, and instant gratification, this scheme can’t be beat!
plus the added entertainment of playing doctor
(y’all know how i love to practice my diagnostic skills on family and friends

as well as myself)

 

oh yeah, i tested negative